As I mentioned in an earlier blog I am going through a purgation, a spiritual renewal, a casting out of the devils. The scales have dropped from my eyes. It's now 3 a.m. and I'm back at it after dropping like a rock on-to my new couch (newly acquired furniture is analogous to my present situation) in my studio.
Yesterday I felt like playing my saxophone, which I haven't in months and of course I have been singing every day. Purgation requires it. Also yesterday I ate very little. I'm fasting before Mardi Gras. It doesn't matter, it has to do with my timing no one else's. Speaking of Mardi Gras my new Mardi Gras wreath came in the mail yesterday and I hung it on my front door. All the way from Louisiana it's bright colored strings of gold, purple and green announce my allegiance to the holiday season. The one that began with twelfth night and ends with Fat Tuesday.
During one of my last purgations several years ago I accumulated the strength to assemble all my old photos in binders along with other memorabilia. I haven't gone through it in years but yesterday I found this written poem in the binder across from some of photos of my very young mother and me as a toddler:
My darling little Danny boy
you have been here just a year
you've filled my every hour with joy
each day you've grown more dear.
With your eyes which are of deepest blue
and hair with touch of gold
and laughter like a tinkling bell
you've brought me joys untold.
Each minute of this precious year
has been so full of fun
for mother and for daddy too
your such a darling son.
I know as each year passes
that you will have to grow
I want to see you be a man
but I love my baby so.
Margaret Shaw O'Bryan - August 22, 1948